Whew! Now that you have completed the first part of Sexercise Two, you are ready for the REAL POWER of this 72-Hour assignment. If you haven’t completed this assignment yet, PLEASE STOP READING. Once you have the first part of Sexercise Two completed, come on back and finish this follow-up section.
The following Questions and Discussion items are designed to foster a deep and transparent exchange with your Great Married Life partner. As you go through this process, remember that there are no “right” or “wrong” answers. The key is to be TOTALLY honest with your lover. If you have been following these articles and Sexercises in sequence, you should be ready to discuss these things without embarrassment or shame. Remember, you are in the garden alone with each other and God. If there is one setting in which you can be totally vulnerable and transparent, then this should be it.
When you are ready to begin, get to a quiet place where you can invest the time necessary to have this discussion. If you have children, you may want to wait until after they have gone to bed for the night. This could take anywhere from 15 minutes to over an hour, depending on how many sub-discussions you want/need to have.
Your first task will be for each of you to get a piece of paper and write down your answers to the “Four Quick Follow-up Questions.” One of you can read the questions and you can each answer them on your own sheet of paper. You will answer each question on paper FIRST, then you are free to move to the Discussion section.
BE HONEST in your answers and discussions. This exercise may bring stuff to the surface that you were not aware of in you/your partner. Just because this assignment has brought it up, doesn’t mean that it hasn’t been there for a while. DO NOT LET THIS BE A CAUSE OF STRIFE! Talk things through. You need to get to the bottom of your feelings and the feelings that this discussion may bring up. If you commit to the process, we feel certain that you will emerge on the other side closer and more intimate than you were before. If you do get to place where things seem like they are at an impasse, please email us and we will try to address it. Wives, inbox Connie on Facebook. Husbands, inbox message me via Facebook.
Oh, one more thing…the 72-hour window for self-pleasuring has closed. There should be no more private masturbation for you/your spouse at this time. As we have stated over and over again, this is something that has no fixed place in our Married Sex lives except in RARE situations. While you are completing these Questions and Discussions, you may become sexually aroused with your partner. Please finish the entire discussion section, and then have at it. Feel free to please each other in anyway you see fit. The next Sexercise in our Married Masturbation section will be released in the next few days.
Here we go…
“FOUR QUICK FOLLOW-UP QUESTIONS”
Read each question out loud. Each spouse should write their answers on their own sheet of paper. When all four questions are answered, proceed to the Discussion section for each question.
QUESTION # 1:
How many Masturbation “sessions” did you have? Did you have multiple orgasms in any of these sessions?
QUESTION # 2:
Where did you do these sessions? What time(s) of day?
QUESTION # 3:
What types of acts did you do to bring yourself to orgasm? Did you use different methods/styles at different times? (Be as detailed as possible)
Question # 4:
What body parts, poses, or sex acts/situations did you focus your mind on while you were masturbating?
STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP
When your all of your answers are written, switch papers with your spouse. Briefly read each answer and then go over the Discussion items for each question. Some of the items may take longer than others. Go through them at your own pace.
Discussion Points for Question 1:
How do you feel about the number of times you masturbated/climaxed? Would you like to have had more?
How do you feel about the number of times that your spouse masturbated himself or herself to climax? Was it a surprise to you? Did you expect the number to be higher or lower?
Knowing your self as you do, would you say that the amount of times that you climaxed during this 72-hour assignment reflects an accurate representation of your sexual appetite?
Knowing your spouse as you do, would you say that the amount of times that your spouse climaxed during this 72-hour assignment reflects an accurate representation of their sexual appetite?
Do you feel that you needed more time to fully enjoy/explore the assignment? Would you like to mutually agree to an extension or “do-over” based on what you now know?
Did you find it easy to become aroused during this exercise? Why or why not?
Was it easy to bring yourself to climax? Why or why not? Can you think of anything that would have made it easier/more pleasurable for you?
Is the ease or difficulty level of your ability to climax during this exercise indicative of your ease or difficulty level with your partner? Why or why not?
Discussion Points for Question 2:
Did you enjoy experiencing sexual release in places and at times other than your routine practices with your partner?
Did you have a reason for choosing the places and times that you chose to masturbate OTHER than to keep in line with the requirement to be ALONE?
Does your decision to masturbate in these places and times reflect your desire for places and times that you would like to have sex/sex play with your partner?
Based on this assignment, do you have any new time/place requests or desires that you would like to explore with your lover in your joint pursuit of Great Married Sex?
Discussion Points for Question 3:
Did you do any acts during your masturbation time that you would feel self-conscious about doing with your partner (or having your partner do to you)? If so, discuss?
After hearing about the acts/methods that your spouse used to bring himself or herself to climax, how do you feel about the acts/methods they used? Do they concern you? Intrigue you? Arouse you? Are you hearing things about your spouse that you were not aware that he/she liked or enjoyed?
Wives, were you able to bring yourself to climax using a “hands-free” method as the assignment suggested? If not, do you have any feelings or thoughts about why? If you were able to, do you see how any of these actions can be replicated with your spouse to achieve pleasure together?
Husband, did you have any trouble bringing yourself to orgasm in various ways (differing hand strokes, positions, etc.)?
Did either of you penetrate yourselves with your fingers/hands in any way? Discuss.
Did you discover any new things during this assignment that bring you pleasure that you would like to share with your partner?
Discussion Points for Question 4:
How do you feel about the things that your spouse focused on during their masturbation sessions? Do you think that they accurately reflect what you already knew would be sexually arousing to them? Explain and discuss.
If you focused on sexual acts/thoughts with your spouse that are not part of your normal sexual repertoire, do you think that those thoughts represent things that you would desire to introduce into your sexual relationship?
After hearing the things that your spouse thought about you while they were pleasuring themselves, are there any acts that you would consider introducing/increasing in your sexual repertoire as a way of fulfilling your spouses “fantasies?” Why or why not?
After you have discussed all of the above items to a point where you both sense that you have been heard and understood, this exercise is complete. If you think of other questions or items to discuss about this Sexercise in the coming days/weeks, feel free to re-visit them with your partner. The next Sexercise will be released soon.
Enjoy sex with other intimately, passionately, and often – hopefully with some newfound trust and vulnerability.
If this Sexercise (or any other item that we have written about) has helped or blessed you, please let us know. We NEED to hear from you!